Friday, August 26, 2011

Taking a break (shocking!) to show you this conversation.

So eventually, I'll feel up to writing the ending of that story that I have started.
I won't say anymore than that.. I want you to be surprised. duh.

anyways, lots of things have been going on around here including (but not limited to) being hit by brick wall after brick wall (figuratively), which then get blown up (figuratively) and I end up becoming a huge cranky bitch who will destroy you should you cross her path the wrong way (literally.. almost happened the other night. I scared this poor kid half to death... I should work on this..)

anyways, this morning I texted my best friend after crying a lot, for silly not real life (even though its real to me) stuffs.

Me: I swear to god, I cry everytime dobby dies.

editor's note: I re-read Harry Potter every summer. I'm on the 7th book now. This is my 4th year in a row doing this... and yes, I cry EVERY TIME Dobby dies. I'm feeling a little teary right now...

C: Awww :( he's just a house elf. I'm pretty sure I cried too.

Me: Dobby is not ust a house elf! Don't speak such blasphemous things to me.

C: Kreacher was my favorite.

Me: Kreacher is kind of a bad ass.

C: Killing for fun! Kidnapping, racist house elf

Me: You are awful.

C: No I'm not :) Are you feeling any better (in reference to the above brick walls of life smacking me in the face everyday)

Me: Not really. Surprisingly I wasn't hungry when I woke up (haven't been eating much. DON'T HATE.) which I thought i'd be ravenous by morning and I've drowned myself in Harry Potter trying to distract from life and really to just avoid everything in general.

                so much truth right there. HOLY JESUS. I am such a Debbie Downer right now.

C: I'm gonna make you eat.

Me: Good luck with that

C: I'll get you a taco

Me: Me no like tacos (which is totally false by the way)

C: Hat Dag? (which is C speak for Hot dog.)

Me: Ew.

C: I just can't win with you

Me: Why are you trying to win?

C: I don't know.

Me: I ALWAYS win. Haven't you learned this yet?

C: I know, beleeee dat (actual spelling)

Me: Good as long as you know.

Then we go on to discuss how I have become hungry and how I should take advantage of the situation and clearly go get food.. even though its a couple hours before my lunch.... skip forward... and we land on this gem of a conversation.

Me: Kill me now! Just! Do! It!

C: Why would I do that?

Me: Because I want you to?

C: It's not worth prison?

Me: What?! Of course its worth prison! What a fantastic story to tell! I'm so famous (false) everyone will know who you killed out of the goodness of your heart!

C: I would get life, what do I get in return

Me: Infamy. Eternal glory for putting me out of my misery

C: And the rest of my life worrying about dropping the soap.

Me: BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH...etc.... (this was a VERY long laughing text)

C: I'm not ready for that

Me: You are such a baby

C: i don't see your logic

Me: The other prisoners would be scared of you because you actually killed the meanest person on earth! (right now, I feel like the meanest person on earth) They would also clearly worship the groung you walk on based on the fact you did such a generous thing by killing me. Thats logic right there.

C: So they would worry about me dropping the soap around me

Me: Exactly. You would be the king pin... Minus the drug deal thing cause you... ya know... be in prison.

C: You have too much confidence in me, I'd be a prison bitch for sure.

Me: At least you can grow a mean prison pussy. (think about it. if you still don't get it, comment. I'll tell you)

So yeah, that conversation is currently happening. I'm sure it can only grow to be more ridiculous especially since I haven't eaten anything in 24 hours... but shhhh don't tell my mom that.. She'll freak out.***

Stupid stress. You ruin everything!! *shakes fist at sky*

***I am now leaving to go have lunch with my mother so YES i'll be eating. Sheesh.

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Part 2. The Plot.

*I think I'm going to need to do 4 posts, apparently I have more to say than I though... who knew?! 

You could feel the excitement vibrating off of me after I had bought my ticket. I was about to board a plane to DC, to spend 3 days with my family and to meet this guy that had somehow made me smile non stop for days.. Of course, I had about a week and a half to go and frankly, time couldn't have moved slower.

Luckily, I had 4th of July weekend to distract me (that weekend is a story on its own, let me tell you) and kept busy and drunk the entire time. When it was back to work on Tuesday I knew that the days would creep by and I had to do something to keep myself from going insane.

Of course, talking to him helped. We talked on the phone and texted trying to decide what we were going to do, well he was trying to decide.. I had made up my mind to just let the day happen and not make any plans. Which was a risk, and I knew that.. but so was the entire journey and if I was willing to take that risk, of course I could risk him planning our day together.

When Thursday finally arrived, I was more than ready to get out there. The day went by fast and by the time I was out of work, I was ready to hit the road. Luckily, I live about 5 minutes from the airport and being it is a SMALL airport, my mom and I took our time arriving and saying goodbye.

Through tears my mom looked at me and said, "I'm afraid you won't come home..."

"Of course I'm coming home mom. Why wouldn't I?"

With that, I hugged her goodbye, made her a promise I'd be home and headed off on my adventure. After an interesting conversation at the airport bar (YAY FOR BEING 21), I boarded my plane and was off. There was no turning back now. I thought back to the many conversations the boy and I had, in my mind nothing but good could come of this.

The flights were smooth, and I arrived in DC with no issue. I was picked up and taken to the apartment. My sister and I talked for about 5 minutes before we both decided we needed to go to bed, it was late and we had early mornings. Of course, I was all jittery and unable to sleep. Tomorrow was the big day and I was nervous, very nervous. Eventually sleep stopped alluding me and before I knew it I was waking up, ready to face the day. The next few hours are dull and drab, filled with me getting ready, reading, trying on every article of clothing I brought, watching daytime talk shows, and calling everyone that would listen to me freak out. And then....

*knock* *knock* *knock*

I started shaking immediately. He's here and this is really happening. I opened the door and there he was. Handsome, smiling, and everything I had expected. He bounded in and shook my hand, "You must be Ella, I'm *name*". Almost instantaneously my nerves were gone. I stopped shaking and was so ready to just go with it, whatever we were about to do for the day. He went to grab his gear as he was staying with us in the apartment before leaving for a military "camp" of sorts (where he was teaching hand to hand combatives). Meanwhile, I gathered my things, took one last glance in the mirror fixing and hiding any imperfections, and once all was said in done, we were ready to start our day.

He opened the door to his truck and I hopped in and the conversation immediately started. It flowed naturally and freely between the two of us, as if we had known each other for years and not just a few weeks. He took me to my very first Army Base, which was neat, I wish I could've seen more than just watching out a window but he had plans, and we had places to be. We took off towards Georgetown, he was giddy and spilled the beans on our first destination. "I want you to see the steps that were featured in 'The Excorcist'" He was so excited... I was so sad I had to admit to one of my flaws.. The one where my movie knowledge and viewing has been limited over the years and (don't hate or kill me) I have not seen the excorcist. He was a bit disappointed, but he took me there anyways, I jokingly told him we could re-enact the movie (obviously based off his memory) if there weren't people on the stairs. It was pretty cool to see something like that, something that only a few people know about, and in DC those gems are few and far between.

After we got back into the truck, we headed into Georgetown to find some lunch. After parking we walked around downtown, reading every restaurants menu, agreeing on restaurants we thought sounded good and those that sounded terrible. We walked all around, he stopped with me as I talked about supporting one of my more favorite causes with an activists. He listened intently and wasn't annoyed or bored as discussed the happenings of this organization. Eventually, I pulled away from the activist and we continued to walk on heading towards the restaurant we chose with a coin toss. He offered his arm as we crossed the street, wanting to make sure little ol' me got across safely.

I was smiling like an idiot. It isn't every day that I get treated that way and I loved it and appreciated it. Here I was, with a man who enjoyed ME for ME. It wasn't about what I looked like, because we had to have a "relationship" through conversation and intelligence. It wasn't about just being nice and putting up with his friends little sister... no, he appreciated me and was enjoying my company. I didn't have to be anyone else. I didn't have to edit out parts of my personality. As we sat there in our restaurant, me with my glass of wine, he with his beer, we discussed politics and it wasn't even a horrible conversation. We discussed just about everything you can think of, all while joking with each other and deciding to try Raw Oysters. Now, I'm always game to try new things, I love food and won't pass down an opportunity to enjoy something else... He is a meat and potatoes guy, but he did it. He sucked down the oysters with me and seemingly enjoyed it... "I'm trying to expand my taste for food, and drinks"

So respectable. So intelligent. So driven.
It was just... wonderful.
Every part of that meal, the food, the drink and the boy sitting across from me with the bluest eyes you have ever seen.

And despite only having a day together, we were only just beginning..

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

A story, in 3 parts. Part 1. The Opening Credits.

This is my story that unfolded over the course of the last month.
I've decided to break out of hibernation and tell you because, well, I need to share it.
Here goes nothing..

I am not afraid to let my hair down, let every part of my crazy out and just be me. Someday, some where... somebody was going to find this endearing, maybe even grow to love it, but at the time I didn't care. I was too busy being me and having a good time to care if anyone noticed.

On the night of my final birthday party, I left my father's radio show, ready to drink some beer, dance and make a genuine fool of myself on that beautiful lake. A friend of mine, one that I've known for a few years, decided he was fond enough of me to do this for me at his lake house. I couldn't have been more grateful. I could drink and enjoy and indulge with my friends without having to worry about anything. There would be no trouble and no drama. The exact kind of night I had been dreaming of.

As I left, I heard the familiar beep of my phone receiving a text message and being a responsible driver, I checked it immediately. It was my Sister, talking to me about a boy she had mentioned to me and the she wanted me to meet.

"Great," I thought, "a set up, these always end well."

She gave me his name and told me to facebook him. I told her it would have to wait until I had time, I was going to the middle of no where. Where cell phone service is merely a dream and you actually have to enjoy people! Imagine that.

I arrived at my party and promptly forgot about the name of this boy and just enjoyed. I drank and went on a paddle boat ride at 3am, no worries though, life jackets were worn. (We are smart drinkers) Upon waking up the next morning, I went home to spend my day nursing myself back to health after nothing but alcohol for 3 days. Surprisingly, there wasn't any hang over, just pure exhaustion. This kind of exhaustion only allowed me to lay in bed, unable to sleep mind you, and do the facebook thing.

His name then popped back into my head.
I had to do it, otherwise curiosity would get the better of me...

"Sister, hes cute, I'd meet him"

"Did you friend him on facebook?"

"umm, no, thats a little weird don't you think?"

"No. Just do it."

So I did. Of course, I debated back and forth with myself... do I? don't I? It was enough to make my head spin. Eventually, I decided to just go for it. What could it hurt? He was a friend of my sister and brother-in-law, what harm could it do? I mean, I'll meet him one of these times I fly out to DC (where they live).

The next morning, I didn't think much about anything especially nothing having to do with a certain boy that I had friended. until I checked facebook... and wouldn't you know it, he had sent me a message. Something short, sweet and to the point.

"You must be Ella, Libby's sister. Apparently we are supposed to meet"

I replied in the only fashion I knew how at the time because frankly, I was floored this guy had decided to message me..

"Yes, that would be me. Now, tell me about yourself."

And he did. Not in a few words here or there, no. In letter form, with punctuation, and proper spelling and with an excitement you understood just by reading his words. It was amazing and utterly surprising... A surprise I was oh so grateful to have.

We ended up writing long elaborate "letters" (it was on facebook, come on now) back and forth. By the time the end of the day approached we decided to take the next step and exchanged numbers.

Me, being ever so clever, I responded to the last letter he wrote me (the one in which he gave me his number) and turned around and sent my first text to him "You've Got Mail". His response was perfect, "I love Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks" From then on out, we couldn't stop talking. It seemed any opportunity we had we were texting, which eventually turned into phone calls.

I was smiling like a fool every second of every day.

"This is like your movie Ella" My mom told me, and thats how I came to view it in a sense. I am realistic, which tends to hurt me in the long run, and knew that this wasn't a movie, but I remained optimistic. I had to, here is a boy who just through letters, texts and a few phone calls had swept me off my feet. I wasn't afraid of being honest or being myself. That was something new and terrifying on its own. I'd never quite done that before.. I'd only ever been versions of myself.. or lost myself completely. To be my own person and to be accepted for it, one of my luckiest moments. You know how it is, the heroine (female hero, not the drug *geez*) struggles with self acceptance and then BAM along comes a boy that changes everything, of course I saw it as my movie, and I wanted to fast forward to see how it ended. So. Badly. But where is the fun in that? Fast forwarding doesn't make for a good story or movie.

I had been planning to come out to DC to visit my Sister and Brother-In-Law the second weekend of July. When I told him about this, he was all for it. Sure there were some extrenuating factors that we couldn't help. He is in the military, when duty calls, you go. Somehow it worked out that if I came out, we could spend a day together. A whole day. Just him and I. What a thought, this was something I surely wasn't expecting. But of course, who am I to turn down an adventure?

So I called him.....

"I bought my plane ticket."

to be continued....